In reply to some recently written letters Andrews wrote ; He had gone in good health to the hills in order to spend there his summer holidays, but he told me afterwards that the mental pain he experienced soon after his arrival was almost equivalent to a death-agony.He had hardly expected to survive it. This was all the more strange because it came upon him quite suddenly at a moment when he was feeling a sense of physical exhilaration in the supreme beauty of the Himalayas and also the delight of the charge from the intense heat of the plains. I remember him saying to me that the shock of agony overtook him like a thunderstorm out of a clear, unclouded sky.Rabindranath wrote to Ajit Kumar Chakraborty on 25th April;
" God has always given me new life. He pulled me again. I don't feel any grief in this world - I have taken the shelter of truthfulness but it cdan't be that I could not myself becoming just - I must be right top to bottom. I should not have any softness.My God has given me some capital to run His business. But being tempted I have not invested the full amount. I have saved some amount for myself which leaves some holes, small in size, that causes disaster to big business. After coming at a long distance from the field of work, this became evident on looking through the book of account. I am getting ready for managing the situation." His mental condition was not expressed in that letter, it became clear from the letter written to Rathimdranath;
"When I was in Ramgarh my conscience pricked me because I could not perform my duties in my family, my school, my work as a zeminder and my country. I ought to have donated all my assets and belongings without any hesitation. I was thinking that in my life I could not feel how I would be able to realize my idea or I should die. I should be born a fresh to do my prayer. My mind is now full of darkness and my relatives whom I love are facing disaster."His present mental condition was revealed in his poems written at that time.;
" Charana Dharite Diyo go amare", "Gaan geye ke janay Apan Bedana", etc.
Rabindranath, Andrews & Ramananda Chatterjee
